Betrothed
by tripwatcher2
Summary: Trip & T'Pol of course! This is just my AU version of events when Trip finds out about Koss. Rated M for possible later chapters.


_Author's Note: I have taken liberties with the storyline so this doesn't follow the same timeline as the show. This is just my AU version of events from when Trip finds out about Koss._

_Words in italics and quotes denote conversation_

Chapter One

He stood in the darkened hallway not exactly sure what had led him to her door at this late hour or what exactly he should do now that he was there. No doubt she was sleeping or meditating and he did not want to disturb her but he so desperately wanted to see her.

The argument they had in engineering earlier that day kept playing through his mind. Damn, but that woman could be infuriating! She was right of course, but that didn't make it any easier to take orders from her – especially in front of _his_ engineering crew! She had actually yelled at him! They usually worked well together but lately things were becoming more and more tense between them. There was something bothering her but he knew she wasn't the type to talk about it. He had gently tried to pry it out of her during their frequent neuropressure sessions to no avail. Of course he was also on edge lately and still raw from the sudden death of his sister and so many others back on Earth.

He ran his hand through his short blonde hair making it stand at odd angles from his head and then sighed deeply. He was just about to turn away from her door when it opened unexpectedly. Before him was a vision in blue silk. Lord, but he did love her in those pajamas! Her hair was mussed and if he didn't know better, he would have thought she had been crying. His heart lurched in his chest at the sight of her looking so vulnerable and he hated the thought that he might be the cause of her distress.

For a long moment they simply stared into each other's eyes, neither of them sure what to do or say. Finally, she stepped back and motioned for him to enter her quarters. "_Goin' somewhere?_" he asked her in a raw, husky voice, his southern accent stronger than usual. "_To see you_", came her quiet reply. "_Why?_" he asked and held his breath waiting for her answer. "_To apologize for my behavior_" she told him without meeting his gaze. "_I should not have talked to you that way in front of your staff_".

He had never seen her this way. Terribly sad was the only way he could describe her beautiful face at that moment. "_Talk ta me, T'Pol_" he gently prodded, stepping closer to her. "_I want ta know what's goin' on and I want ta help ya with it, whatever it is._" This time it was her turn to ask the question – "_Why?_" in a soft voice. He tried to explain. "_Because I care, because I…I …_

He let the unfinished statement hang between them, not sure if he was brave enough to finish the sentiment he had been about to declare. He did love her and had admitted it to himself but was afraid to say it out loud for fear of what she would say. He didn't think he could take her rejection – his heart was just too bruised at this point. There were so many complications with their relationship that he just wasn't sure they could ever make it work. He also wasn't sure exactly how she felt about him. At times, he could tell that she desired him physically and she seemed to enjoy their lively debates and banter over supper at the Captain's table. Were they friends, co-workers, or what? Could they – would they - ever be more? He wanted to know the answers to these questions but was afraid to press her for fear that he would lose what he had with her. He had decided that if they could only be friends, then he would take that. It was better than being without her altogether. The thought of not being around her devastated him.

"_I am having some…some…personal problems_" she finally stammered, glancing at him to see his reaction. He squinted at her and rolled his tongue in his cheek. That simple gesture made her heart skip a beat because it was something he usually only did when talking to her and she loved the fact that there was a part of him that only SHE got to see. He was thoughtful with her, contemplative even. She never saw him act that way with anyone else, even the Captain. He seemed to study her intently much of the time and she secretly enjoyed the attention. She too watched him as covertly as possible whenever he was near.

"_Anythin' I can do ta help_?" he asked, fearing that HE just might be one of her _personal _problems. She looked up at him quickly and studied his face. She truly felt that she could trust him but then again he was a co-worker and so she didn't know if she should tell him what was bothering her. He might feel compelled to talk to the Captain about it and she absolutely could not let that happen!

"_Ya can trust me ta keep a secret if need be_" he said, sensing her reluctance to confide in him. She nodded, then squared her shoulders and sat down on the edge of the bed. He pulled her desk chair forward and sat down so that their knees were almost touching. She felt a strange compulsion to reach for his hands but wasn't sure if she should. It had never been in her nature to voluntarily touch others or to seek touch for comfort but he seemed to bring that out in her. As if sensing what she needed, he slowly folded both of her hands in his and gently rubbed them, all the while never taking his eyes from her face.

His concern and gentleness almost brought her to tears but she swallowed hard and decided to just say what needed to be said before her fear made the words too difficult to speak. "_I am betrothed_" she whispered raggedly, looking down at their joined hands. His fingers stilled but there was no other outward sign of what he thought of her blunt statement. After several moments he gently asked "_Ta who_"? She looked up at him then with a stricken look on her face. "_His name is Koss and we have been betrothed since we were seven. Arranged marriages are very common among my people and his parents were colleagues of my father's and he is a well-respected scientist and…and…_"

She realized she had been babbling and abruptly closed her mouth. She avoided looking into the beautiful blue eyes of the man holding her hands. She knew she would start to cry if she did – and Vulcans DID NOT cry!

"_Do ya want ta marry him?_" he asked. Her quick, adamant shake of the head made him breathe a little easier but then a thought occurred to him that made his stomach drop. "_Do ya HAVE ta marry him?_" he asked with dread. "_It will shame my mother if I do not_" she whispered with anguish in her voice. "_I have already caused her much grief by continuing to serve on this ship. My mother feels that serving with so many humans has made me willing to turn my back on the traditions of my own people_".

"_What will ya do?_" was his next question. He wasn't sure how he felt about her revelation, only that it was similar to the last time he had been sucker-punched in the stomach during a barroom fight. That had been a long time ago but he still remembered that awful feeling. It had brought him to his knees and he knew if he hadn't already been sitting down, that he would have hit the floor by now in much that same way.

"_I will do the only thing I can. I will return to my homeworld and marry Koss._" Her voice shook as she said this but there was also an underlying determination that he recognized. He understood the need for honor, especially when it came to family. He came from a long line of "do the right thing" kind of thinkers. But at the same time, he also believed that a person should be free to choose their own spouse! Just the thought of her with another man made him physically ill.

She looked intently at his face then and said "_I am sorry. I did not mean to hurt you but knew that I had to tell you this._" When he didn't speak for a moment, but simply looked at her, she finally prompted him "_Please, tell me what you are thinking._"

What was he thinking? What was he thinking? What the hell did she think he was thinking? He was thinking that his world has just blown apart right in his face. He was thinking that he was losing the best thing he had ever had. He was thinking that he wished he had tried harder to kiss her during their last neuropressure session. And so he found himself staring at her full, pouty mouth and leaning towards her.

The kiss was tentative at first but when T'Pol opened her mouth slightly and tilted her head, Trip immediately and unconsciously deepened it. Their tongues touched and fire snaked down her belly to simmer low. He brought a hand up to the back of her head and gently pulled her toward him. Slowly, tenderly, they continued to kiss until finally T'Pol pulled back enough to rest her forehead against his. They were both breathing heavily and Trip's hands actually shook from the effort of NOT pulling her into his lap.

"_I'm sorry. I didn't mean ta do that. I mean, I wanted to…but I don't wanna make this any harder for you than it already is. I understand that you feel like you hafta marry him…for your mom an all, but I….I…dammit…I don't want ya to!" _The words were spoken softly but urgently while they continued to sit with their heads together, their hands clasped between them. _"Is there any way out of this?"_ he asked her huskily.

T'Pol was surprised at his reaction. She had expected him to get angry and upset with her. After all, he was an overly emotional human, right? She never expected him to try and understand, even respect her need to honor her mother. Then it dawned on her -- this just proved how much he did indeed care about her. Her eyes misted over and she kept her head down so that he would not see her tears. _"I can think of no way to avoid this, although I have tried."_

All of a sudden a new, horrifying thought hit Trip square between the eyes. _"You'll go live on Vulcan, won't ya? I…I won't see ya anymore, will I?"_ He gulped, trying to swallow the lump in his throat that just wouldn't go down.

_tbc?_


End file.
